Emperor Penguins
Les Lobbs Diary
December 2015
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01/12/2015
15.00
We spent the night at Julie's and left at 08.00 to get to Exeter for my 09.30 appt, we did it with minutes to spare - where does all the traffic come from!
The gym hadn't changed much since my last visit, though judging from the amount of sweat I produced, I think they must have turned up the heating. I left there feeling well "exercised" and at Aldi I stayed in the car recovering, while management did some shopping.
The toy total is increasing with a panda under construction at the moment; the aim is to get as many as possible done for this Saturday's mini market.
Scottish Advent Calender
A man in northern Minnesota woke up one morning to find a bear on his roof. He looked in the Yellow Pages, and sure enough, there was an ad for "Up North Bear Removers." He called the number listed and the bear remover said he'd be over within an hour.
The bear remover arrived, and got out of his van. He had a ladder, a baseball bat, a 12 gauge shotgun, and a mean looking, heavily scarred old pit bull.
"What are you going to do.?" the homeowner asked.
"I'm going to put this ladder up against the roof, then I'm going to go up there, and knock the bear off the roof with this baseball bat. When the bear falls off the roof, the pit bull is trained to grab his testicles, and not let go. The bear will then be subdued enough for me to put him in the cage in the back of the van."
He then handed the shotgun to the homeowner. "What's the shotgun for?" the homeowner asked.
"If the bear knocks me off the roof, you shoot the dog."
17.00
Infamy, infamy, they've all got it in for me!! The doc has just told Dawn she has fallen arches and should buy some sensible shoes with insoles - obviously didn't know who he was talking to. Guess where we're going tomorrow?
02/12/2015
08.45
B&Q Exeter open at 07.00, so we popped over and got the joists etc we need to repair the floor and are now back home having a coffee. In B&Q there is an overhead sign for timber about as far as you can walk to the left, so I scuttled along there on my crutches only to find they didn't have the size we needed. A man was called who informed us that the size we were after was kept in the garden section; guess where that is, as far as you can go at t'other end of the store. To save me walking that far, he went with Dawn and brought it back for us. Now we've got to empty and move the wardrobe to give us enough space to work in.
16.00
Job's done; two new joists spliced in and flooring fitted back. Andrew came over to "borrow" my sea fishing gear this afternoon and gave us a lift back in with the wardrobe (got to have somewhere for the new shoes!).
03/12/2015
18.00
Head of decorating has been putting on the first coat of "Apricot Blush" and it looks good (nowt like a blushing apricot), another coat should do it.
Dawn got some insoles for her sagging arches, now she just has to get used to wearing them.
Visited t'hospital for my 6wk post op check-up this afternoon and all is well - doesn't want to see me for another year! Not very pleasant conditions driving home, but my personal driver managed admirably. Spose I'd better start driving again soon!
04/12/2015
10.00
Window sills biscuited and glued in place - I had forgotten what a heady aroma Gripfill has! Tis all coming together now, we should be able to fill and sand down later today and might even get an undercoat on.
We've used the multitool a fair bit and it really is a great bit of kit; it slices between floorboards to remove the tongues and cuts through excess cavity sealer with ease.
What happens when you let kids play with sticks >>>>>>>>>>>>
05/12/2015
10.00
P'raps a bit optimistic yesterday; rubbed down the sills this morning and I'm going to give them an undercoat, after I've cooked myself a bacon sandwich. Dawn's taken the toys etc. to the stall at the mini market: the charity has now raised enough money to buy the old building, so they're all very chuffed.
19.00
Dawn did very well this morning, and this afternoon took Mum to the Xmas tree festival, where Mum met friends and enjoyed looking at all the trees.
Every year local groups and individuals set up decorated Xmas trees in the church; it's not a competition, but a local tradition that raises funds by charging a small entry fee and providing tea and cakes.
A.xx
IMPORTANT REMINDER ----- It's time to get the sprouts on.
I was beaten up by a woman today!
I was in the lift when a busty lady got in.
I was staring at her boobs when she said
"Would you please press one"

So I did......

I don't remember much afterwards.....
09/12/2015
17.00
After the walls had dried, following their lathering in paint, we put up the new curtain pole on the bungalow side of the sliding doors and head of drapery hung t'curtains; looks a proper job! It has taken us a while, and not a little fiddling, to take the flooring over the cavity where the old window was removed, but tis done now and 'er's 'appy.
The window sills have had their last coat of gloss and tomorrow, peut-etre, we plan to fix the vertical blinds in the main conservatory window.
Slight hiccup today when the "ring-n-ride" bus didn't turn up to take Mum to Morrisons; Dawn changed her togs and dropped her at Morrisons, while she did some shopping in Tivvy. Mum came back happy and a bit secretive, so wonder what she bought?
10/12/2015
12.00
Look out all you other road users, I'm driving again! Dawn's foot gets quite painful when she drives, so it will be easier on her foot, and my nails, if I drive.
We needed a little more polyfilla - ain't it always the way - and for a change we went to B&Q at Exeter. We ended up with filler, masking tape, gripfill and a pack of skirting boards. Not many people about, spect they're all chrissy shopping, so we nipped into Aldi on the way home, where I managed to slip a wheel of stilton into the trolley.
13/12/2015
18.00
Laminate '*?/ flooring!! I'll give um "just clicks into place".
It's taken us the best part of the day and I've still got the last row to cut; they need ripping down and it was getting cold and dark, not the best conditions for using the table saw.
In complete contrast, the blinds we got from Wilsons went up easily and work a treat, so we've ordered the other three for the double door end - should be here for xmas, so that's 'er pressy sorted!
16/12/2015
11.30
One step backwards; I went to the physio gym yesterday and twanged my bliddy back halfway through the exercises - I'd done all the hard ones!
The flooring is all down, so we started cutting the skirting this morning, very slowly, and now I'm stretching my back while head of returns has taken an unused pack of laminate back to B&Q.
Mum went to the local RBL women's Xmas meal last night; it was gone ten when she finally rolled in, with us waiting for her as if she were a teenager on her first date. This morning she has gone with a friend on the "ring-n-ride" to Morrisons in Tivvy; they usually have a wander round and get a lunch in the cafe before the coach brings them home about 13.30.
A cop stopped me as I was driving home from the pub.
As I got out of the car he said "You're staggering", I said "you're not bad looking yourself".
Great to see Mary on Keyboard and Joseph on vocals, on this year’s Christmas Stamp
20/12/2015
10.15
This morning we took up all the masking tape and touched up in a couple of places before the chief scrubber cleaned the floor. The next job was carrying the settee from the summer house to the patio; it took us a while, but with a length of rope we managed it. That is now being cleaned before we bring it into its new home, glad we opted for the wide double doors or we would have needed help getting it in.
Fortunately, we have been blessed with a drop of sunshine and not the gales that were forecast.
I've taken a couple of pics before we fill it with junk, but when I transferred them to the computer, I discovered the sd card is nearly full - where did I put the sd cards!!
Want to make the turkey look more interesting?
Cut a lemon in half and slide under the skin before cooking.
19.30
Reet then, we'em moved in!!
Dawn's a happy bunny now that we've got a room of our own - it's like starting married life all over again. The first jigsaw of the winter has been started, though the edge pieces seem a bit elusive; it's "Padstow Harbour", so should bring back some memories.
Fork Candles
The Fottle

I called in at the Patent office to register some of my inventions.
I went to the main desk to sign in and the lady at the desk had a form that had to be filled out.
She wrote down my personal info and then asked me what I had invented.

I said, “a folding bottle." She said, "Okay, what do you call it?"

"A Fottle."

"What else do you have?"

"I have also invented a folding carton."

Again she said, "what do you call it?"

"A Farton."

She said, "Those are silly names for products and one of them sounds kind of crude."

I was so upset by her comment that I grabbed the form and left the office without even telling her about my folding bucket.
Surprise, surprise!
28/12/2015
08.00
Well that's over - what did we buy all that food for!!
We went to Julie's for Xmas lunch, but they were all full of colds so we came home after the meal. Andrew dropped in for a chat - mainly about fishing, because he has now started beach fishing while the trout reservoirs are closed. He has had a few whiting, but the water is still too warm for cod.
Jean and Ivan brought Mum home yesterday and stayed for lunch, a leg of lamb and all t'other stuff, followed by xmas pud.
I think we're going to have a ride to Burnham today - I've got to do some walking and the weather doesn't look too bad.
Tip - you don't have to go through all the orbs.
30/12/2015
19.30
This morning we eventually put together the bed base that I started to make before my op. It's been pouring down all day (wish I wor in Spain) and we've not been able to do anything outside, so Dawn's been jig-sawing while I got next year's web pages ready.
Yesterday, after my session at the physio gym, I went to the mobility place to find out why my appt was taking so long to arrange - "what appt?" she said. After lots of apologising I was told there was a cancellation and they could see me that afternoon (good job they're not organising Heineken's xmas party!). They measured my leg and gave me another temporary raise to fit in my shoe and said my prescription would be changed for the next shoe I have altered.
The appt meant we had to miss a lunch party with some friends, but we turned up late and there was still plenty of food left for us.